Jane is obsessive compulsive and because of this, she never gets over any of her addictions, she just moves on to the next one or transfers it to some other behavior. The whole cocaine thing was a fast and furious episode that impacted the rest of the family only minimally. Well in the short term anyway, the long term financial implications were life changing.
What came next was a never ending dance with drama and disruptions in the daily routine of the family. I spent some time thinking through the events of this post and cannot seem to remember what event triggered Jane’s use of Darvocet. This started after the first bout with amnesia, but I don’t think her doctors prescribed any pain relievers during that time. As I write this, I think her taste for the pain reliever was prior to her first foray into amnesia. Jane was always in need of attention from the medical field, whether it was a doctor visit because she did not feel well to two or three trips to the ER or urgent care for some unfortunate accident. By the time we reached this point in our life, I was quite used to scrutiny by hospital staff suspicious that I was the reason for Jane’s visit.
Prior to us moving to the town we now live in, Jane managed to receive a diagnosis for Lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, back issues, Limes disease, and several other ailments. She also underwent several surgeries to remove non-essential internal organs. By this point in her life, Jane was a hollow shell who was very familiar with an array of pain medications. To this point however, whatever they prescribed her was enough to make her happy.
Now things were getting out of control…again. I think the first trip to the ER for an injury was just as she was recovering from her amnesia. Jane was cooking, a responsibility she was resuming as she regained her faculties. She was boiling water, I think for scalloped potatoes and I was doing something else in another part of the house. As was the norm with incidents like this, I heard a commotion from the kitchen and hustled in the direction of the ruckus. Jane was grasping her arm, her face contorted in pain. The pot was lying in the sink steam rising from sink, the counter, and Jane’s arm. She somehow spilled boiling water on her hand and arm.
As I write this I realize that the aforementioned incident was the third, or fourth such incident in a succession of accidents in our home that lead to trips to the ER. Yet for some reason I cannot recall those that came before this. There is one other that stands out in my mind which I will include later in this post. The reason I know this is not the first trip to the ER for an accident in the home is because we used to go to doctors that are a part of a different medical system in our part of the country. However, as these trips to the ER became more frequent, Jane changed which ER she wanted to go to. The reason, she was becoming concerned for me. With each trip to the old hospital, they became increasingly suspicious that I was the cause of her need for medical care. It got to the point that when we reached the end of the road I would ask, this one or that one, and Jane would hiss her preference through gritted teeth.
The scalded arm and hand was one of the first trips to the new hospital in a town south of the one we lived in. I think most anyone reading this has experience some sort of a burn from boiling water. There is no denying that the pain is intense, especially at first, but it usually subsides. Unless you’re unfortunate enough to spill the water on clothing or you submerse yourself or a body part in the water, then the burns tend to be worse and the pain longer term. Jane’s burns were first degree burns and she should have been content with a burn cream, a bandage, and a few aspirin. After all, that is what a sun burn is, first degree.
It was embarrassing to see her carry on the way she did. I watched as the doctors offered looks of bewilderment as to the level of pain Jane was displaying. There was no blistering, no peeling of the skin, just some reddening. Yet she acted as though she spilled boiling acid on her arm and it continued to eat away at her skin. However, as was always the case, the doctors gave her what she wanted, a dose of Darvocet and a prescription to take home with her.
The incident I mentioned above may have been prior to this one. We were both getting ready for bed when for no reason she could explain Jane spilled water on the linoleum kitchen floor. It was like she just tossed the water on the floor. She acted surprised and confused but could not tell me what happened. I went to clean up the mess and she stopped me saying it will dry up on its own.
Do you ever get that nagging sensation that something is not right and you should go with your gut? I knew that that water on that linoleum floor was trouble. I could clean it up with just a couple swipes of a towel. Even more nagging was Jane’s dismissal of the mess. This was during her clean freak period and messes out in the open like that were intolerable. Yet, I was driving truck during this period and sleep was essential for me to do my job safely, so I ignored the nagging, no screaming voice in my head, listened to my wife like a good husband and we went to bed.
I just settled into the air mattress, pillows fluffed properly, and all the covers just right when Jane leaped out of bed and said she needed to get something. The voice started screaming louder than ever and sure enough there was a loud thud from the kitchen. Jane slipped on the puddle of water she just created minutes ago and was writhing about in pain on the floor. As was the norm I asked if she was alright, she acted surprised as to what just happened and we debated for way to long about whether she needed to go the hospital or not.
The trip was inevitable, by this time we made dozens together. There were several more after this one including the scalding water incident. If I counted up all the hours I spent in a hospital for myself and all the other people I have known in my life, it would not total a 10th of the time I spent in them on Jane’s behalf.
Before the whole Darvocet drama was over I listened to Jane rail against our insurance company for restricting her supply. The letter from US Customs telling us they intercepted her Internet order of Darvocet and that they were not going to forward it on was interesting. That was another $60.00 down the drain and me fearing a knock on the door from the DEA.
All this may have taken place prior to the cocaine thing. I knew Jane was having issues with pain medication before we moved and this was just an extension of that. The frequent trips to the ER were the coming to a head, so to speak. I say this because I don’t remember this issue resolving itself on its own. I think this dovetailed into the cocaine habit and both were curtailed by her one day trip to the drug treatment facility. All this would have been about a decade ago, so please allow me a little memory loss when it comes to the details of the timeline.
She is still an addict, but she has found ailments and a doctor that allows her to receive a regular supply. It’s not Darvocet anymore, based on the some of my Internet searches while writing this, Darvocet has fallen from favor. Jane has moved to an old standby, morphine.
zeroptions 